In a healthy committed relationship, communication about sex is the key to enjoyment for both man and woman.
Believe it or not, some of us didn’t learn until later in life what an orgasm is and waited even later to experience it.
An orgasm is identified as -A climax of sexual excitement, characterized by feelings of pleasure centered in the genitals and (in men) experienced as an accompaniment to ejaculation.
In “The Ultimate Guide To Orgasm For Women; How To Become Orgasmic For A Lifetime” by Mikaya Heart, the author states, “The how of sex has to do with getting your lover to set the stage, to prepare you emotionally first to create a sense of safety, slowly, lovingly, attentively- to open you up physically before approaching your genitals.”
According to Heart, “Most women want to have an orgasm at some point and many do need specific kinds of stimulation.”
Due to the lack of sex education, some of us go into relationships [marriages] expecting our partners to know our bodies; even though some of us truly don’t know our own body.
“We are so hung up about and divorced from our bodies in Western culture that couples are often too embarrassed to really study one another’s bodies and end up fumbling around in the dark,” said Heart. “Unfortunately the erotic parts of the body don’t contain magnets that will automatically draw fingers, tongues, penises, or any other desirable object to them. And fumbling doesn’t generally lead to a delightfully sensual experience.”
It’s important to keep the line of communication open with your partner. Don’t be afraid or embarrassed to share what you like and dislike. Don’t expect your partner to be able to read your mind. And don’t assume that your new partner will like the same things your ex did.
“Given that women’s anatomy varies so much its a good idea to take the time to admire what she’s got between her legs and familiarize themselves with her physical parts,” says Heart.
It’s important to be in tune with your emotions. It’s equally as important for men to be aware of these emotions as well.
“Being in love and feeling attracted to our partners are often considered important elements of orgasm,” explains Heart. “And sometimes our feelings for a partner can preclude the need to come.”
Don’t get caught in a sex rut. Sticking to the same old moves, not allowing yourself to be open to trying new things can cause the sex to be unfulfilling and to happen less often.
“Each orgasm is different,” explains Heart. “Some give merely physical release; some are spiritual ecstasy. At its best, there is a slow, exquisite buildup that feels increasingly electrical where gradually more and more parts of the body get “involved” in the buildup, where you begin to feel down to the cells of your body and up to the spirit of the heart like a whirl pool that spins wider and deeper.”
Keep in mind that in order to experience true passion leading to orgasm, you must truly open your mind to exploring your body, keep the lines of communication open and remember it’s a two-street.